Having no more dreams, but trash fires, bagels, and questions about dogs and morals: January 2017

Found

  • The BEST dog:

Wrote

  • “I’m not sure if it’s a good sign that I recognised this place just from the furniture.”
  • “I know this dog.”

Watched (or saw)

  • Two performances I’ll never forget (and both for their very own reasons)
  • A tiny mountain range in ice on a table
  • Rogue One, twice
  • Someone with a smiley balloon
  • Beer forming small streams on the subway floor
  • The sunrise above the sea
  • A skyline at night

Said

  • “Happy New Goat!”
  • “Are we a classic case of customer loyalty gone a little bit too far?”
  • “I’m carving out my own self-confidence like it was a pumpkin and I was making a Halloween lantern.”
  • “I had a safety pin and vodka. What else should I have done?”
  • “He needs someone for the long run and I need… curtains!”
  • “It’s with nitro, it’s awesome!”
  • “It had philosophy, vampires, Buffy references, stuff about smashing the patriarchy, and a feminist agenda. That’s all I need!”
  • “You should really lower your expectations towards me.”

  • “Make sure I can finally forget.”
  • “I would like to assure you that, yes, I do have the look and feel of a giant pixel.”
  • “I have a pizza reflux.”
  • “Unfortunately, as we already know, calendars.”
  • “I rarely say that these days, but this gives me a tiny bit of hope.”
  • “I kind of want to get married now just to test how ‘quick and easy’ a divorce here actually is.”
  • “I think my brain has given up on trying to understand where I am.”

Was

  • In the theatre
  • By the fireplace
  • In Portugal
  • In the cinema
  • Desperate
  • Asked to pick the music in the café
  • In full-on panic mode
  • In the US
  • Jetlagged, maybe
  • Overcaffeinated, likely

Did

  • Have the last Pastéis de Nata
  • Buy more books (in case you want to send me a present someday: I really like books)
  • Return home to find flowers on the floor and get scared af
  • Make birthday plans (already)
  • Wear six plus one shades of eyeshadow for reasons. And mean it.
  • Show up when it mattered
  • Pet many great dogs
  • Find the best place in New York (seriously)
  • Wear a party hat

Did…, although it was a bad idea

  • Count.
  • Not recharge my camera battery in time.

Had

  • Persimmon
  • Pizza
  • Bagels
  • Donuts
  • Pizza on my coat
  • Coffee on my nose
  • Coffee all over my face (only because of the rain)

Read the internet

Read Books


E se um dia hei-de serpó, cinza e nada,
Que seja a minha noite uma alvorada,
Que me saiba perder… pra me encontrar…

And if one day I’ll be dust, ash, and nothingness,
then may my nighttime be a dawn,
may I learn to be lost… so I can find myself…

– Florbela Espanca, excerpt from Amar!


Heard

  • “Soooo… what’s the latest Lena-gossip?”
  • “What are you doing?” – “Having coffee, sitting around, not thinking about the end of the world. The usual.”
  • “I am just a creature of cheap snacks and air conditioning.” – “Add some gaffer tape to hold it together, and you get me.”
  • “Today is the day of nothing.”
  • “Vampire times time equals long-term decision making strategy.”
  • “This drink tastes like pizza.”
  • “You should wear a beard.” (We’ve been to this point before. This time though, it was repeated by several people independently (one of them weighing in from 10 time zones east); so it looks like this is getting serious.)

  • “‘You should be cast as Ryan Gosling’, thats what I keep telling myself.”
  • “Do you like Ryan Gosling?” – “No.” — “But what if he were pizza?!”
  • “This is the first time I’ve seen you in jeans. Usually, you’re much more presentable.”
  • “Are there Drop Bears in Spreewald?”
  • “You’re likely not expecting that, but what if the date goes well?”
  • “We have a problem.” — “No, we have a challenge!”
  • “Blankets, coffee, pizza. Your place. Now.”
  • “I look like I have serious problems.” — “You do, but I still hope they’re not as big as they look right now.”
  • “The future has a dog sitting in a window.”
  • “The best advice I can give you is: don’t follow your dreams.”

Listened to

Thought about

  • Versioning.
  • Change.
  • Conference speaking.
  • Trash fires, the world and activism in the year 2017.
  • Finality and how you can never be fully prepared for how sad it’s going to be when it’s actually over.
  • All the things that still must end.
  • On a scale from 1 to LOL, how likely is it to get someone’s consent for starting a relationship with them, only because one wants to hang out with their dog on a regular basis?
  • And if it’s really the cutest, fluffiest, and overall best dog ever (and the person inquiring is at least trying to be a half-decent human being)?

By Lena

Fast walker, avid reader, poetry fan, public speaker, violinist, pianist in the making, intersectional feminist. Works in tech, writes about anything here (and less frequently than in the past).

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